Sunday, July 30, 2017

Freshman Pitfall #6 - Distractions at Home


When you are at college life does not stop around you.  I often have students who are distracted by problems at home – some unfortunately very serious.  I had one very promising student who had to withdraw because her family could not survive without her.  Some problems my students have encountered, and some coping strategies, are:

  • Breaking up with boyfriends or girlfriends at home or at another institution (or even one at your own school) - This is quite traumatic at the time.  It does not help to say that you will survive and be happy again, and in fact that the break up could be a good thing.  Take some time to review your own personal goals and why you are in college.  Maybe talk to someone at your school’s counseling services or a good friend.  Don’t do anything stupid like recklessly going out and partying!   Take it easy for a few days and let your emotions cool down.
  • Financial concerns – this is always a concern for students, and rightly so.  College is very expensive and paying for it now and later is an ongoing factor.  Consider a part-time job (one on campus is your best option if you are find one) or at least a job at home during breaks.  And keep track of your spending!  The cost of fruit smoothies and fancy coffees adds up.  Limit yourself to one a week as a reward for studying and/or attending all classes!
  • Family illness, surgeries or a death in the family – It is a good idea to discuss this with your family before you start college.  What are their expectations and what are yours?  If you are the first in your family to attend college they may not understand the pressure you are under to stay on top of your work.  Again, if there is a problem at home consider talking to a professional at your institution.  In some cases there are grief support groups you can attend.  Unlike an illness, grief does not quickly lift and you may have difficulty getting back on track.

On a side note, if there is a death and you talk to your professor about missing class to go home, do not be insulted if they ask to see an obituary.  Unfortunately, some students seem to have multiple elderly grandparents and take advantage of the professor’s sympathy.

In all these situations it is important to always be on top of your studies so that you are best prepared to deal with any eventuality and to keep your professors informed.

Next blog we will switch to the positive things you can do to be successful!  Until then, keep studying!
*****
First Semester Success: Learning Strategies and  Motivation for Your First Semester (or Any Semester) of College, by Dr. Arden B. Hamer, is available at amazon.com, wordassociation.com and barnesandnoble.com.   Click on the upper right link.

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